i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize
