Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
I think I am morally bankrupt
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
I think I just sharted jello shots
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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