in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Randomize
