I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
I have peed in a lot of sinks
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