I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
I'm sitting next to this guy at the bar. I wrote him a little song in my head it goes "there is no fucking chance you're getting in my pants" gonna sing it to him after he buys me another drink.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
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