is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
