It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
Randomize
