So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
this will be a night to untag.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
They have beer where we have blood.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
Randomize
