My friends, they love my intelligence
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
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