end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
honey bunches of taint.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
