Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
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