if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
Randomize
