Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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