quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
Randomize
