We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
Why is there uncooked bacon under my bed?
You insisted on taking it to bed with you. You grabbed it out of the fridge while mumbling "If I leave this out, you fuckers are just going to ruin it."
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
Randomize
