Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
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