I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Randomize
