If i come over, it means nothing
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
Randomize