a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
Randomize
