I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Randomize
