The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
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