So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Randomize
