well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
Randomize