is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
Randomize
