OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
Randomize
