OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Randomize
