they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
