so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
Randomize
