My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
there is puke in my bra ... again
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
