I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
