He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
Randomize
