Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
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