ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
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