We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
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