I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
