Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
