Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
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