i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
Randomize
