she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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