I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
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