you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize
