Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
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