the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
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