i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
Tinder date just called. I was supposed to be there 30 minutes ago but I'm on a 27 game win streak in Park...?
Fuck that man! Tell her your dog died or something. Reschedule that shit, you can't stop 2K at a time like that. Ball is life bro... Priorities.
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Randomize
