Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Did you ever notice that cashews look like fetuses?
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
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