i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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