I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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