And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Randomize
