What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
My apartment stinks of burning failure
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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