nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
Randomize
